I know to many people she is J-Lo or just "that ho," but before she was Jenny from the block, I stumbled across her "If You Had My Love" video, and I was quickly won over. Now, I've never really been an ass man, and I know that's what most people talk about with Lopez, but I've always thought she was really nicely proportioned, and, to be sure, she knew how to use what God gave her. Initially, the video caught my attention because of its metatextuality. She is dancing in the video while men watch her on television or the internet. Cameras also follow her through her daily life. The voyeuristic quality of it all was intriguing, and became even more so when the men rose from working on a filthy engine, smeared with grease and sweat to walk over to look at the video on the television. When they reach up to wipe the sweat from their necks, it hit me with a flash: these men may be cleaning up, but subconsciously they're jerking off. This woman is totally hot. It was a moment where I completely identified with the men on-screen. I felt exactly the same way.
So I saw her "Waiting for Tonight" video, which I totally liked as well: hot girls going up the Amazon for a millenium dance party--what's not to like? And then for no reason, she's flirty dancing thigh-deep in water in a black string bikini. Who comes up with these things? I don't know, but it pushed my buttons. After that, I never missed one of her video launches, and, though they steadily declined in quality, they never failed to deliver on the basic promise that you would see her dancing seductively. Art that fulfills its promises is, in my book, good art, so far as that goes.
Anyway, some time later I did pick up her On the 6 album (another bargain bin purchase), and I was very impressed. Now, it's not really great music, but, like her videos it's very sexy music. You have to listen to it on headphones, too, because otherwise you miss out on the effects of her throaty seductive vocals, especially the long segment of whispered Spanish on the second track. She is speaking directly to you, whispering in your ear in a tone that sends thrills right down my spine to my coccyx. A lot of songs on the album are about messed-up relationships, and this is the crown of them all. You really feel how terribly wrong things have gone, and the Spanish is all about the breakup and how painful it is for things to be ending. It ends with "I will never regret this,"and you feel like you've been through it with her: the ecstacy, the fights, the anger, the makeup sex. And the illicit sex, the knowing you're betraying someone sex. The afraid to get caught sex. The god-I-should-stop-but-I-must-have-it sex. The . . . well, you get the idea. There's a lot of )water( under the bridge here.
I've mentioned how I love her hats, and here's another hat picture of her.
I haven't bought any more of her albums. On the 6 is too much like a real relationship, and I've never had luck with trying to rekindle old flames. And now she has twins. There's a lot of music in my collection that I'm ashamed of, but I will never regret my fling with Jennifer Lopez.
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